Endlich ICH

Warum ist’s am ende immer am schwersten?
Warum kann ich jetzt nicht glücklich sein?
Warum freu ich mich nur für andre was ist mit mir?
Warum kommt mein Leben nicht zur Ruhe?
Warum habe ich diese folgenschweren Schritte gemacht?
Warum habe ich keine Lösungen?
Warum habe ich keine Antworten?
Warum fühle ich mich nur noch schwach?
Warum über Warum!!!

Aber dennoch ich lebe noch!
Wieder… erstmals…

Ich habe tausend Fragen.
Ich habe keine Antworten.

Aber ich habe mich befreit!

I don´t know what to say to this.

You made the decision you thought you needed to make
You should be happy after all you thought about it a long time.
If it was surely the right decision you would not have so many doubts.
Why then run away when you are so unsure....

Yes you live, you have "escaped" as you say in your last line.......

But the question still remains.......escaped from what?You still seem to be trapped somehow.

I did have been happy in the beginning
And doubts are normal after a certain while
Those are just questions coming up and I defiantly need answers for them but this will come within it's time.
You know my live I had ran away a view times! This time I will not run any further I’ll just stand there and wait till my daemons will catch up then I will and I have to face them!

So com’on here I am ready for the last and final stand!!!

Of course there are doubts but it depends how strong these doubts are thats what we have to ask ourselves.There are moments we feel strong and then moments we feel weak but when the weak and doubtful moments are too many we really have to think and consider the alternatives....the pros and cons.What is it all worth???Is it worth wondering what if....is it worth trying to move on completely and forgetting or is it worth a try knowing the truth is out there now.......

Help is also coming in another form soon and tomorrow is the first step with that....hopefully things are put in perspective for you.......but as you know we are here.